as you get older I keep applying for jobs - but getting few interviews. Its hard to do it right - most jobs won't employ anyone over 40 - over 45 its hard - over 50 difficult and over 55 - employers think you're senile. The government and councils because of equality issues - are so used to discriminating against men - use age and lack of direct Continue Reading

Hi again I am so sorry for not replying sooner it seems that, one of my emails seemed to have gone astray, so I thought I would reply hoping that you would still remember who I am :)) If by some chance you have changed your email, I guess I would have lost an opportunity too. shame :( Anyway, I'm still willing and waiting here Continue Reading

Three blond MEN are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across. The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to cross the river, so God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across. The second man prays to God to make him even smarter, so God turns him into a dark-haired man and he Continue Reading

Having had my car stolen I am now using the buses - which I have not used properly for over 30 years - ie I've only used the occasional bus - and in the cold weather - like now - I've always used the car. I have forgotten how cold you can get - standing around waiting for a bus - with a slight wind chill factor - and you feel your legs -and body Continue Reading

Why is the BMW the favourite make of car in the city? Because they can't spell Porsche. An economist has worked out that nine women can produce a child in one month. Two atoms are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?" "No, I lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, I'm positive!" Two Continue Reading

Government officials have pointed out that immediately the firemen went out on strike the number of call outs reduced - and the number of fires reduced. This could not possibly be the result of the public taking greater care - I know - I know - they should do anyway - and the fact that the period of the strike was held in particularly wet and Continue Reading

... women reported that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because: 1. In order to get their attention you have to turn them on. 2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless. 3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem. 4. As soon as you commit to one, you realise that if Continue Reading

I think I've found one Continue Reading

... so love making to your wife is becoming routine and boring. Be creative - role play - try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That'll do the trick. Ah great - but how do you make it last for an hour?" Play NHS doctor. How do I do that? Just keep her in the waiting room for 55 minutes! Continue Reading

... erm sorry George - but you really are going to have to postpone the war on Iraq - you see - we have - erm - a slight problem with military supplies - erm it seems that as was reported in the Odtaa Files - October 31st - erm well the British army - hasn't got any boots. Well strictly speaking that's not completely right - we have boots size 1 Continue Reading