A real problem - one of the doctors at my local surgery - is basically incompetent - and lazy. For example he told me I had RSI - and then told me he didn't have time to talk to me - so I didn't get any tests. I also have a stomach problem - which he diagnosed as IBS - without any tests. When I went back later with a lot of pain - he told me not Continue Reading

"Here's the gift" he said presently. "Night time" she said darkly. "I'm having a shower." he said wetly. "My foot is on fire." she said warmly. "A one minute orgasm" he said hurriedly. "I've accidently shot your mother, your father, your brother, your sister and the dog." she said innocently. "My name is Hamlet." he said Continue Reading

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When a hard man - the bully- the thug - beats up someone in a bar - he always has a justification. He is usually 'reluctant' to start the fight - but he must be shown 'respect'. So its usually the 'accidental' spill of a drink - the reasonable demand for respect such as 'who are you looking at?' - before the fist - broken glass or boot hits the Continue Reading

According to psychologists - and they should know - being they're obsessed with sex - and all - that the tie is a phallic symbol - OK - lets face it - all it is - is an arrow pointing down to - er - you know where. Well on BBC radio this morning a fashion designer said - Look at politicians - when they're being interviewed by women journalists - Continue Reading

A potential new internet game - search stringys - if you use a package like extreme tracking to monitor your site - it has a facility to tell you the frequency of words used to find your site. Look for phrases among adjacent words. So here are a few: naked angus the burreldress off johnsongirls christmas toiletburrell got orgasm jokesbutler Continue Reading

According to a posting on wildcatmania - the Odtaa Files is a 'kick ass' site - this is our proudest moment to date - thank you - thank you - he says - hand touching forehead - and swoons. That's the last time he'llkick ass in a hurry Continue Reading

The was a young netter called Seb Who put his home page on the web He said "What a drag I've missed out a tag The nerds will all think I am a pleb" by Louis Boyce Continue Reading

Today is the twelfth day of Christmas. It is the custom - certainly in Britain - and I assume many other countries to hang up holly in the house. The origins of this custom date from pre-Christian times - when holly - and the leaving out of food - and the having a feast - and drink - and more drink - and yet more drink - was as hospitality to the Continue Reading

'Friendly Fire' is not a term I like. It is the accidental killing of your own side by 'cock up'. In the coming war with Iraq - and let's not play games - George Bush - wants a war - and by George he'll get his war - and it will be in February 2003. For reasons best know to himself - Tony Blair wants Britain to pay the 'blood price' - ie he Continue Reading